Welcome to the Q&A! Following are the questions we have received via our site, Facebook, and Twitter. Feel free to ask a question in the question box below! If you leave your name we’ll post that along with your question and our answer.
Ask us ANYTHING. Have a medical problem and want advice from someone who has absolutely no idea what they are talking about? Interested in knowing whether Justin Bieber is male or female? Want to know your future chances with “that girl or guy?” Ask away!!
Sparky asked: “Can I marry this site? I mean people have relationships with their cars, so why not websites?”
- Are you a dog? We are a little concerned that you are a dog. Sparky is a dog’s name. If you are a dog, then holy shit yes you can marry us. A dog that types and can express romantic interest, that’s better than a bag of Cheetos. And we love Cheetos. But if you are not a dog and you are human, that’s cool too, we’ll still marry you.
roadwax asked: “My only concern is that school children might see this site. Please can we make sure that this happens?”
- This is an excellent question and we strongly feel that children would benefit from visiting our site. Embedded in our posts are life learned facts which we hope our kiddo viewers will understand and implement. These include topics such as: “There’s no such thing as stranger danger” – “drugs are fun” – “how to kill mommy and daddy while they’re sleeping” – “how to juggle knives without getting cut” – and the most important, “how to love yourself in public without getting arrested”
Caitlin from, well, wherever Caitlin lives
- Hi there. Because I’m awesome & currently STD free, how would I go about convincing the Potato that I should write for you Spudness?I’d love to be considered to contribute to the ridiculousness of the site.Hoping to hear from you soon (purchased eye-condoms as a precautionary measure).Kind regards,
- Hi Caitlin, Thanks for the message. We would like to start off by asking, did you know that there are over 3,000 ways to spell your name? There are only a few variations of potato: POTATO, PotatO, and potato. You’re life must be very confusing. See, here they are:
Caitlin Catelin Caytlin Caytelin Catlin Caetlin Caitelin Cayetlin Caitlan Catelan Caytlan Caytelan Catlan Caetlan Caitelan Cayetlan Caitlyn Catelyn Caytlyn Caytelyn Catlyn Caetlyn Caitelyn Cayetlyn Caitlynn Catelynn Caytlynn Caytelynn Catlynn Caetlynn Caitelynn Cayetlynn Caitlynne Catelynne Caytlynne Caytelynne Catlynne Caetlynne Caitelynne Cayetlynne Caitlind Catelind Caytlind Caytelind Catlind Caetlind Caitelind Cayetlind Caitland Cateland Caytland Cayteland Catland Caetland Caiteland Cayetland Caitlinn Catelinn Caytlinn Caytelinn Catlinn Caetlinn Caitelinn Cayetlinn Caitlinne Catelinne Caytlinne Caytelinne Catlinne Caetlinne Caitelinne Cayetlinne Kaitlin Katelin Kaytlin Kaytelin Katlin Kaetlin Keightlin Kaitelin Kayetlin Kaitlan Katelan Kaytlan Kaytelan Katlan Kaetlan Keightlan Kaitelan Kayetlan Kaitlyn Katelyn Kaytlyn Kaytelyn Katlyn Kaetlyn Keightlyn Kaitelyn Kayetlyn Kaitlynn Katelynn Kaytlynn Kaytelynn Katlynn Kaetlynn Keightlynn Kaitelynn Kayetlynn Kaitlynne Katelynne Kaytlynne Kaytelynne Katlynne Kaetlynne Keightlynne Kaitelynne Kayetlynne Kaitlind Katelind Kaytlind Kaytelind Katlind Kaetlind Keightlind Kaitelind Kayetlind Kaitland Kateland Kaytland Kayteland Katland Kaetland Keightland Kaiteland Kayetland Kaitlinn Katelinn Kaytlinn Kaytelinn Katlinn Kaetlinn Keightlinn Kaitelinn Kayetlinn Kaitlinne Katelinne Kaytlinne Kaytelinne Katlinne Kaetlinne Keightlinne Kaitelinne Kayetlinne
- As for your question, we would love to have you contribute towards our ridiculousness!! In fact, we encourage anyone who’s ever wanted to write an article like ours or The Onion to contact us! Our whole idea for this website was to write funny stuff and get people involved in the process. Few things though, anything you write should funny or funny-ish and not highly offensive.
- Also, thank you for being STD free. Daily Potato News is all about safe sex with potatoes.
- Feel free to contact us above or email any articles to firstname.lastname@example.org
Michael from Jackson, WY
- In reference to our statement on Facebook: “Welcome to Daily Potato News. We apologize in advance for any STDs you may catch while visiting our website.”
- Michael: What do you mean, “STD’s”? lol!
- Us: Hi Michael, glad you asked! Ever wonder why your eyes start to burn after staring at your computer screen for too long? It’s because microscopic bacteria, known as Chlamydia trachomatis, are transmitted through the light waves coming out of your computer. Chlamydia trachomatis, more commonly known as Chlamydia, then infests your body and goes right to your happy parts. In order to prevent this, we always recommend wearing eye condoms while viewing our site.